Reunion
by Merula
Summary: Our take on after the series. Cliche, but we tried to make it fun. Complete.
1. Where have you been?

Standard disclaimer: We do not own Trigun! We wish we did!!  
  
This is a bit cliché, but after we watched the anime we were horrified (like everyone else) that Wolfwood died. That sucked. We are relieved that in the manga, he's still alive!  
  
The sign was dusty, like everything else on this planet, but it was polished under the dust, the letters sharp and clear. The Bernadelli Insurance Society. This had to be it. The man read the sign again, just to make sure, and then sighed. He was being an idiot. He knew this is where they worked. Hadn't he heard it a dozen or so times? "I'm Meryl Stryfe and this is Millie Thompson. We're from the Bernadelli Insurance Society." Meryl was always falling back on her authority as an insurance agent. Millie never did- but then Millie had her stungun for authority. At the thought of the stungun the man winced. Hopefully she didn't take it to work with her. She should only carry it when they traveled for the company. A depressing thought- they might not even be here. They might be out following another dangerous criminal- they might even be dead... He mentally shook himself. Stop delaying! There was only one way to find out what had happened to the girls. The man brushed the dust from his faded green coat, straightened his shirtsleeves and took off his sunglasses before he headed inside the building.  
  
Meryl Stryfe stared at her keyboard, flipped her hair off her shoulder and frowned. Her hair was getting too long- she wanted to cut it short again, but with the longer hair she'd felt like a slightly different girl from the one that had lost her heart to the humanoid typhoon. A little over a year ago she and Millie had watched Vash disappear in the desert. They were still alive, so she could only assume that Vash had won. But where was he? No reports of towns destroyed by Vash the Stampede, or any kind of claims sighting him had come into the office. No reports on his movements on the satellite. He was gone and he wasn't coming back. She felt the familiar prickle of tears at the back of her eyes. Don't think about it. Think about tomorrow when you leave for your vacation. Think about seeing Millie- meeting that huge family of hers. Yeah. Focus on that.  
Of course, thoughts of Millie led to thoughts of Wolfwood. He had died without them- alone in that little church. They had buried him out there and Millie had given Vash the cross punisher. Millie had seemed to deal with it okay after the first storm of her tears, but when they got home, she had left the insurance agency and gone back to her family. She said she couldn't take traveling anymore- and Meryl couldn't blame her. It was better for her at home. At first her letters had seemed sad, but they seemed to be getting happier, so maybe Millie was too.  
Meryl smiled. Dear Millie, she really couldn't wait to see her. Her fingers began to move across the keyboard. Finish this- work through lunch if you have to- leave early and get on the road to Millie's. Her fingers flew, her desperation to be gone infecting every muscle.  
A shadow fell across her desk. She ignored it.  
"Excuse me, miss? Can you help me?" She looked up into a familiar face. One she had never expected to see again. It looked almost as surprised as she felt. "Meryl? That is you, isn't it?"  
"Mr. Wolfwood?" Meryl felt the blood drain from her face. "You- you can't be here- you're dead, we buried you... " Maybe the stress was making her lose her mind- a hallucination brought on by stress- yeah, that was it. But- he looked slightly different- his hair was a bit shaggier, face more stubbled, different clothes...  
"You did- but I wasn't dead. Legato and Knives..." He paused and looked uncomfortable. "It's a long story, and I'll tell you soon, but what matters is- I am really here. I'm not dead." He held out a hand to her and she cautiously touched it. Warm and callused, his hand closed around her slender cold fingers tightly. He was real. "See?" He was surprised to see tears form in her eyes.  
"You are here." Meryl leapt to her feet and hugged him tightly. "I'm so glad to see you!" Then she drew back and slapped him across the face. "You bastard! It's been over a year! Why didn't you let us know sooner?" Wolfwood touched the cheek she'd slapped and laughed.  
"Same old Meryl, I see. Is- is Millie here?" She heard the hopefulness in his voice and her anger vanished.  
"I'm sorry, but no. She quit. Went back to her family." Meryl looked like she wanted to say more but a voice interrupted her.  
"Stryfe! I don't recall the company rules saying that we can hit our customers..."  
"Uh, yeah, chief. Um, he..."  
"I'm so sorry, Mr.?"  
"Nicholas D. Wolfwood." Wolfwood stood up and shook the boss's hand. "Miss Stryfe and I met when she was following the humanoid typhoon. It's a long story, but if she wants to hit me, I don't mind." He flashed a grin. "She and Miss Thompson were real lifesavers out there. You should be very proud of her."  
"Oh we are," the boss smiled as Wolfwood's charm did it's magic. He could talk the birds down from the trees, Meryl thought with a faint smile.  
"I didn't mean to interrupt her at work, but this is the only way I knew to reach her. I am very sorry."  
"It's perfectly all right." The chief smiled at Meryl. "Say, Meryl, since your friend is here, why don't you leave now? You can start your vacation a little early."  
"Thank you, chief!" Meryl stood up, straightening the last of the papers on her desk.  
"And say hello to Millie for me, will you? Tell her we miss her- even if she was always late." Wolfwood shot Meryl a speculative look.  
"I will chief! Thank you!" Meryl grabbed her coat with one hand and Wolfwood with the other. "C'mon, I'll buy you a doughnut."  
  
"What happened to Vash?" They sat in the small coffee shop, a small stack of doughnuts between them.  
"I don't know," Meryl replied quietly. "He went out to fight Knives and never came back. He might be dead for all I know." Wolfwood studied Meryl intently. He wasn't surprised he hadn't recognized her right away. Not only was her hair different, but she seemed thinner? sadder? than before. The sparkle he remembered in her eyes was dimmer than it used to be.  
"Do you think he is?"  
"No." Meryl's eyes were focused on her coffee cup and Wolfwood sensed she didn't want to continue the discussion of Vash. Time to change the subject.  
"So, you're going out to visit Millie for your vacation?" That got him a smile.  
"Yeah. She's been inviting me for awhile. I think..." Meryl trailed off and she took a grip on herself. "Why don't you come with me?"  
"Just like that? You don't even know where I've been or what I've been doing." Wolfwood looked at her searchingly. "I could've been doing horrible things. I betrayed Vash after all- I'm sure he told you that I was working for Knives all along."  
"Are you still?"  
"No. I haven't seen him since that day... Chapel shot me in the back. He thought he killed me. Hell, I thought he killed me. But it was just Legato playing with us. He stopped my bleeding, and did something to my body so that you'd think I was dead. Kind of like hibernation, he said. He came to retrieve me that night." He didn't want to tell her how he'd woken up in the ground, lungs screaming for air, sure he was trapped in hell. He looked at his fingers for a moment, remembering the blood and dirt that had caked them as he's clawed his way out of the ground. "I think they were planning to do something really bad to Vash with me- but I think Vash managed to mess up their plans." Don't tell her about that dream. "All I knew is one day my guards had vanished and I was alone. So I walked out of there. Broke, nothing but the clothes on my back. I healed up and came here." He looked up. Meryl was studying him intently, those big violet eyes of hers focused on his face.  
"Why?"  
"Why do you think?" Wolfwood shifted in his chair. "Is she... did she find someone else?"  
"No, of course not." Meryl smiled at his relieved expression. "So, then you do want to come with me?"  
"Yes. Unless- unless you think it would hurt her more?" His voice shook just a little and Meryl knew what it cost him to ask that question.  
"Don't be an idiot." Meryl snapped as his eyes widened. "It would hurt her more if I tell her tomorrow: 'Hey, Mr. Wolfwood stopped by the office. Remember him? Guess what? He's still alive. No, he didn't come with me. Why? Because he's a big chicken.'"  
"Hey, that hurt, insurance girl!"  
"It was supposed to, preacher man. Don't you dare get all noble on me now. My friend was devastated when we thought you were dead. She put on a cheerful face for me most of the time but I heard her crying at night." Wolfwood looked down at his coffee guiltily. Oh hell, Meryl frowned. Wrong tactic. She leaned over the table. "Look, let me put it to you this way. You have 2 choices: Come with me of your own free will, or I'll tie you up and drag you there."  
"This is how you get dates, huh?" Wolfwood grinned as Meryl burst out laughing.  
"I've missed your smart ass comments." She raised an eyebrow at him. "So, are you going to be sensible? Or do I get a rope? The bus leaves tomorrow morning." Wolfwood looked at her for a moment.  
"Do you know where Millie lives? How to get there?"  
"Yes, of course. It's not that far away- only 50 iles or so."  
"Then why don't we take my bike? We can leave today."  
"Your bike? Don't your bikes always break down?"  
"No! Well.. at least not this one. She just got a tune up. I worked for a couple of days at a mechanic shop to make sure."  
"All right then. Let's just stop and get my suitcase. Can you wait that long?" Meryl laughed and Wolfwood joined in.  
"Is my impatience showing that much?"  
"Only a little. C'mon, let me get my things." Meryl rose to her feet and led him outside. "Will you give me time to change out of my office outfit?"  
"I'll have to, you can't wear a skirt that short on a motorcycle." Wolfwood grinned. "Unless you're planning on stopping traffic."  
"I live right here." Meryl pointed to the building across the way. "Go get your bike. I'll be ready in 20 minutes."  
"20 minutes? Can you make it 10?"  
"Don't push it, preacher man."  
  
Meryl walked out of her building with a light step. She felt happier than she had in months. She was taking Wolfwood to Millie. At least one of them would get a happy ending. Provided nothing else went wrong. She smiled faintly, feeling the derringers under her coat. She would make sure of it.  
Wolfwood looked up as Meryl got closer. "Perfect," he said as he looked at her jeans, white shirt and hip-length blue coat. Her hair was twisted up and clipped against her head. "Nothing that can get caught in the wheels." He strapped her case down on the back of the bike and handed her a helmet.  
"I don't remember you wearing one of these."  
"I didn't want to push my luck," Wolfwood replied, as he put on his own and sat down. "Ready?" She climbed on behind him.  
"Yes." She grinned. "We're heading west." 


	2. Enter the Stampede

Many, many thanks to those who reviewed!!! We were very sad to hear that Wolfwood does die in the manga- no wonder we never read past nine.... sigh That's just depressing!!! Well, that's why we write fanfics right? Standard disclaimer: Trigun is not ours. If it was Wolfwood would LIVE damn it!!!  
  
Two days earlier....  
  
Millie was out with her nephew. Well, one of them anyway. Her sister had asked Millie to pick Billy up at his friend's house and meet her in the middle of town. Millie had to smile. Their town was small and very safe. Millie's family alone counted for a whole fourth of the population. But her smile faded when she thought of some of the towns she had seen on her travels. Maybe her sister wasn't being overprotective, just cautious. She and Billy were greeted by everyone they passed with warm smiles and friendly words. She was truly lucky to live in such a wonderful town surrounded by people that cared about her. Why did she still feel so empty? Her sisters, all of them married and in their own houses, had been after her to pick a man and get married. But there was only one man she wanted, and he was dead. She didn't cry, or even lose her smile at the thought of him, she just felt empty. Would the emptiness ever go away?  
"Auntie Millie! Auntie Millie! Look at that man!" Her nephew tugged on her hand. "Who is he? He's not one of us!"  
"Billy!" Millie scolded. "That's not a nice thing to..." Her voice trailed off. The man, leaning back on the bench in the center of town eating a doughnut, was wearing dark brown pants with a matching vest over a white shirt. His blond hair was hanging down in his eyes and his sunglasses had a blue tint. The spiky hair, red coat and yellow sunglasses were missing, and a different gun was hanging off his belt. She would still know him anywhere. "Billy- go meet your mother. She's at the bookstore." She pushed her nephew towards the store gently. "Auntie will be right back."  
  
Vash the Stampede took a bite of doughnut. What a nice little town. Peaceful, quiet- a lot like that town he had left the insurance girls in last year. He could see them standing there, Millie with her cheerful smile, Meryl with her heart in her eyes as he walked away from them. They hadn't been there 6 months later, but it had been a long time to wait. Maybe their company had called them back to duty. They probably still worked for that insurance company- whatever it was called. Maybe-  
But then again, would they really want him back in their lives? His life was a lot less chaotic than it used to be, but it was still not exactly peaceful. Besides, he was different. What could he offer her? It wasn't right to wish to see her when he knew he could never... Still, he didn't have many friends left, and he'd give up the whole bag of doughnuts just to hear...  
"Mr. Vash?" He looked up into a cheerful, smiling, familiar face. "I thought that was you! How are you?" She had shorter hair now, and had traded her big yellow trenchcoat for a dress. A silver cross dangled from a chain around her neck. But the big blue eyes and the cheerful smile were the same.  
"Millie? What are you doing here?" He felt like someone had struck him with a lightening bolt. If Millie was here- maybe...  
"I live here." Millie's eyes twinkled at him. "It's so good to see you!"  
"It's good to see you too." He stood up and she hugged him tightly for a moment. His ribs creaked under the strain. "How have you been, Millie?"  
"Just fine," Millie's eyes shadowed for a moment with pain and Vash felt a lump in his throat.  
"It's kind of odd to see you by yourself, Millie. I've gotten used to the insurance girls arriving in my life as a pair," he said without thinking, trying to get her mind off the past. 'Oh great, Vash, like that won't remind her!' He scolded himself, but Millie smiled brightly.  
"I know, but I quit the agency and moved back with my family. Meryl is still there though."  
"Is she?" Vash was briefly tempted to ask exactly where the agency was, but squashed the thought. Meryl didn't need him around.  
"Uh huh...Mr. Vash- are you staying here in town?"  
"Just passing through." Vash shrugged.  
"Why don't you stay with my family? We have lots of room and they'd all love to meet you!"  
"I..."  
"Oh, please, Mr. Vash? Just for a few days?" Millie's blue eyes opened wide. He couldn't resist that look. How did she do it?  
"If you're sure they won't mind?"  
  
Millie's family definitely didn't seem to mind. They welcomed Vash with open arms. He stayed with Millie and her parents at the family's farm. But the other brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews, aunts and uncles and various other friends and relatives were always dropping in. It was like living in a large friendly madhouse. Vash was fed, fussed over, talked to, joked with, and made to feel like simply another member of the family. Mrs. Thompson apologized for it on the second morning.  
"We've just kind of treated you like one of us, I hope you don't mind but after Millie's letters and all we feel like we really know you already."  
"No. It's been great." Vash smiled at her. "You've all been terrific. I can see where Millie gets it now."  
"Millie's so happy to have her friends with her." Mrs. Thompson poured him another glass of milk. "That co-worker of hers is coming to visit soon too."  
"Co-worker?" Vash's hand tightened on the glass.  
"Miss Stryfe. Millie's been trying to get her to come visit for ages. She'll be here in a day or two. I'm glad of it. Millie didn't seem much like herself when she moved home but between you being here and Miss Stryfe's visit it's like she's back to her old self."  
"I'm so glad." Vash's heart was pounding in his chest. Meryl was coming here? Millie had known of course- that's why she asked him to stay for a few days!  
"Mr. Vash?" Mrs. Thompson sat down across from him. "I have to be honest- I hoped- well, I want you to tell me what happened to Millie out there. I know she got her heart broken, but she won't say how. Her sisters have been trying to set her up, but she keeps refusing. I had thought that maybe she's in love with you, but ..." Vash found his voice.  
"No. Millie isn't in love with me. She is- was in love with a preacher. He..." Vash paused and swallowed. It still hurt. "He was a good friend of mine."  
"Was?" Mrs. Thompson asked.  
"He died." Vash looked down at the table.  
"Oh... my poor little girl. Did he love her?"  
"Yes," Vash replied without hesitation, "I think he really did." He stopped, thinking of how Wolfwood had looked at Millie after he shot Zazie. "She was very important to him." Mrs. Thompson looked thoughtful.  
"What- what was he like?" Vash smiled, his mind easily calling the priest's image up in front of him.  
"His name was Nicholas D. Wolfwood. He was a preacher, like I said. He traveled around raising money for an orphanage that he founded near December City. He helped people, especially children, whenever he could. 'Lending a helping hand', he called it. He had a really beat up motorcycle that he loved- well, several really beat up motorcycles that kept breaking down. He smoked, occasionally drank, and was an expert shot. He carried around a huge cross and a portable confessional. He made us laugh a lot, but he could also say things that would show you that you weren't fooling anyone. He was a good man." Vash paused, feeling the sting of tears at the back of his eyes. "I think you would've liked him." Mrs. Thompson touched his hand gently.  
"It sounds like Millie isn't the only one who misses him."  
"No." Vash looked at the tablecloth. "I do too."  
"Thank you for telling me about him." Mrs. Thompson rose to her feet and left Vash alone with his thoughts.  
  
Later that night Vash escaped after being thoroughly beaten at chess by Millie's elder brother. He walked outside to get a breath of fresh air. Millie was outside looking up at the stars. She didn't look at him, her eyes still searching the heavens.  
"Hello, Mr. Vash." She said quietly.  
"Millie- I want to thank you for letting me stay with you again."  
"Oh it's no problem. My family really likes you. I knew they would."  
"So, what are you doing out here?"  
"Looking at the stars." Millie's voice wavered a bit. "It's something that I do now. Mr. Wolfwood and I talked about the stars that... night..." Her hand touched the cross at her throat.  
"Did you?"  
"Uh huh." Millie took a deep breath. "So every night I come out here and say good night to him. Does that sound silly?"  
"No, of course not." Vash replied gently.  
"I guess it doesn't. I just wish I hadn't listened to him- I wish I had at least been there for him... gotten to say goodbye... He had to be alone..."  
"I think about it too." Vash touched her shoulder comfortingly. "If only I had followed him right away! But he told me where Knives was and I realized that he had to have been working with Knives the whole time...."  
"He wasn't a bad man!" Millie finally looked at him, eyes narrowing.  
"No. He wasn't. I visited his orphanage. They told me that some men had come to see Wolfwood. Threatened to hurt the children if they didn't do this job for them. He had a reason for what he did. He was a good man, Millie. Never doubt it." Millie's expression cleared slightly.  
"Is the orphanage okay? Did the children have to leave?"  
"It's fine. Some nice people are taking care of it. That's one of the reasons I didn't go right back to that town to meet up with you girls."  
"Did you ever?" Millie asked, her eyes focused intently on him.  
"Yes. Six months later..."  
"We waited for you, Mr. Vash, we really did. But, after awhile Meryl said that there was no point in waiting anymore. The agency was demanding our return and she knew I wanted my family. So we left. I am sorry."  
"I'm the one that's sorry. I... delayed going back. Was Meryl very mad?"  
"Oh no, Mr. Vash. She was sad, not mad. She said you would've come back if you could've, but something must've happened." Millie looked back at the stars.  
"I..." Vash sighed and then smiled as a faint hum filled the air. "Hey, hear that, Millie? A motorcycle. Maybe it's a sign from God for us."  
"That's what he'd say." Millie smiled.  
"Does someone in town have one?"  
"No, I don't think so." She peered through the darkness. "It's coming closer." She walked through the garden and looked over the gate. "It's kicking up a lot of dust." The motorcycle was slowing down and Millie could make out two figures on the back in the light from the street lamps. The bike stopped in front of the gate. The person on the back pulled off her helmet and smiled at Millie.  
"Hey there!"  
"Meryl!" Millie opened the gate and bounded through as Meryl dismounted. Millie hugged Meryl tightly. "I am so glad to see you! But you said you'd be coming on the bus and I didn't expect you until tomorrow!" Vash had pulled back into the shadows to study Meryl. Her hair was longer, her skin tanner, her cheekbones more prominent than before as if she hadn't been eating much. She was lovelier than he remembered. He wondered who the guy on the bike was.  
"I was going to, but I ran into an old friend of ours this morning. I hope you don't mind that I brought him along." Meryl turned to the other person who was leaning on the bike. "That's your cue to take off your helmet, idiot."  
The man slid off the helmet and both Vash and Millie gasped.  
"Mr. Wolfwood?" Millie said, stunned.  
"Wolfwood?" Vash echoed soundlessly. He leaned against the gate, heart pounding in his chest.  
"Is it really you?" Millie took a step forward, hesitantly, swaying on her feet. Wolfwood's heart ached at the sight of her.  
"It's really me, honey." The endearment slipped out before he could stop it. "I know you might be mad at me, but I came looking for you as soon as I could... really." Millie's eyes wavered with tears. "You can hit me if you want," he half-smiled, "Meryl did." Millie moved closer and he met her halfway. She was swaying badly and he worried that she might just faint. He put his arms around her and she gasped.  
"You're alive..." She hugged him tightly as he bent his head next to hers. Tears were streaming down her face. "How?" He gave her a quick version of the story, all the time stroking the soft brown hair, enjoying the feeling of her in his arms.  
"So I came as fast as I could. Are you sorry to see me?"  
"Sorry?" Millie looked up into his eyes. "Of course not! I missed you so much!" He kissed her softly, tasting the salt of her tears. She clung to him tightly, almost afraid to let go. 


	3. And just what have you been up to?

Standard disclaimer: Trigun is not ours. Bummer.  
  
Meryl smiled and leaned against the gatepost. She should go in and give these two a moment alone, but her heart was too full of joy at the sight of them together. It had been such a long time since she had been this happy. Wolfwood leaned down to kiss Millie and Meryl turned to the side to give them some privacy. She unbuttoned her coat and pulled out her hair clip, shaking her hair down over her shoulders. That was better, she thought and stretched. Wolfwood had driven them here non-stop. She glanced over again at the pair and smiled.  
"It's nice to see them reunited, isn't it?" A voice spoke in her ear.  
  
"It's wonderful," she replied without thinking.  
"He came to the insurance agency to find her?"  
"Uh huh. This morning actually. Then he dragged me out here as fast as he could..." Wait, who was she talking to? The voice sounded familiar- Meryl turned her head and found herself looking at a very familiar, much- missed, outlaw. He took advantage of her surprise to give her a quick, hard hug as she stood there.  
"Hey, small insurance girl, it's good to see you."  
"VASH?!" Meryl's yelp was loud enough to pull Wolfwood and Millie apart.  
"Vash?" Wolfwood looked over, surprise in his eyes. "You're still alive!"  
"Isn't that my line?" Vash stepped out into the road and smiled at Wolfwood. "It's good to see you, Terrorist-Priest."  
"You too, Tongari." Wolfwood grinned. "Together again. Well, what were the odds of this happening?"  
"Astronomical," Vash turned slightly and grinned. "It looks like we're drawing an audience." Millie's family was leaning out of windows and the front door, looking towards the street.  
"Ooops. I'd better take you two in to meet the family..."  
  
Wolfwood was telling the story of his adventures to an appreciative audience. He sat in a chair by the fire, Millie at his feet, enrapturing her family with his charm. No, Meryl thought, it's his love for Millie that's winning them over. Wolfwood would often look down at Millie and the expression in his eyes... Meryl smiled. She was sitting on the hearth, next to Vash, several small children leaning on them as they shared popcorn and listened to Wolfwood.  
"So then, there I am, in front of Bernadelli Insurance, wondering what I'm going to say to you," he glanced down at Millie. "After all, it's not everyday that someone comes back from the dead, right? So, I finally plucked up my courage and went in. The place is practically deserted - it's lunchtime and there's no sign of my insurance girl- but there's this one woman pounding furiously away on a keyboard in the corner. So I walk over and find myself face to face with Meryl."  
"You didn't recognize her when you came in?" One of the children leaning on Meryl asked.  
"Nope. She didn't have long hair like that when I knew her." Wolfwood smiled briefly at her. "Looks nice, by the way."  
"Thanks, I think." Meryl made a face at him and the children giggled.  
  
"What did she do when she saw you? Did she really hit you?" Vash asked.  
"Well, first she looked like she was going to faint."  
"Well, duh, I thought I was hallucinating!"  
"So you hit him to make sure he was real?" Millie teased.  
"To be fair, she hugged me before she slapped me." Wolfwood grinned at Millie. "She was happy I was alive, but mad that I took so long to get there."  
"That's our girl." Vash winked at her.  
"Oh shh." Meryl glared back. "I didn't know all this other stuff yet."  
"Then what happened?" Mrs. Thompson asked. Wolfwood picked up the story again.  
"Her boss told Meryl she really needed to leave for her vacation early as she was obviously stressed out..."  
"He didn't say that!"  
"It was implied. So then she dragged me off, bought me coffee and doughnuts, and made me tell her what had taken me so darn long to get there. Then she admitted that she was going to visit you the next day and said that she might consider taking me along if I could assure her of my good intentions. After determining my intentions were in fact, good and honorable, she insisted that we leave right away on my motorcycle and not wait for the bus at all."  
"I insisted?... oh never mind." Meryl smiled and shrugged. "Whatever, preacher man. I know the truth."  
"What is the truth?" Millie asked impishly.  
"I'll admit to the coffee and doughnuts. I'll even admit to... what did he call it? Determining if his intentions were honorable? I thought I was threatening him, but that sounds better." Meryl smiled at Millie and then raised her eyebrow at Wolfwood. "But who was it that wanted to leave on that beat up old bike instead of waiting for the nice safe bus? Who didn't even want to wait for me to pack my suitcase? Who complained that it took me 20 minutes to get all my things together? Who drove us straight here without stopping and yet complained that his bike was not getting us here fast enough?"  
"I give! I give!" Wolfwood held up his hands. "You win. But did you have to diss my bike?"  
"Hey, at least it got you here," Vash pointed out to Meryl. "The last time I accepted a ride from Wolfwood, his bike broke down in the middle of the desert."  
"I remember," Meryl smiled at him. "I kept thinking about it the whole time we were on the way here. What if the bike broke down? What if we crashed? What if Mr. Wolfwood had a nervous breakdown?"  
"Hey!I...!"  
"But you made it here just fine," Millie interrupted. "And I'm glad." She and Meryl smiled at each other.  
"So, how did Tongari get here?" Wolfwood asked.  
"I found him in the middle of town," Millie answered.  
"Hey, I'm not a needle noggin anymore," Vash mock frowned at Wolfwood.  
"Sorry, habit. So how did you recognize him Millie?" Wolfwood looked down at her. "I mean, like he said, he gave up that ridiculous broom- headed look..."  
"Hey!"  
"And no red coat, either," Meryl added. "Does he still have the yellow sunglasses?"  
"Nope. But, he was eating doughnuts," Millie grinned. "It was a dead giveaway."  
"HEY!"  
"Oh, c'mon Vash. She's right. You're a doughnut junkie!" Wolfwood teased. Meryl yawned suddenly, covering her mouth.  
"You must be tired," Mrs. Thompson said kindly. "Millie take her up to your room, she can sleep on your trundle bed. There's one in your room too, Mr. Vash, if you don't mind sharing the room with Mr. Wolfwood."  
"Not at all. I'm used to his snoring."  
"Hey!"  
  
Vash pulled out the trundle bed from under the four poster. It was already made up. "This family is prepared for everything," he muttered.  
"After meeting Millie, can you doubt it?" Wolfwood replied. He leaned out the window and lit up a cigarette.  
"Still haven't given that up?"  
"No way. I needed one down there too. I was shaking- couldn't you tell? I half expected them to lynch me. Hell, if Meryl hadn't threatened to tie me up and drag me here I might have chickened out."  
"That's Meryl." Vash grinned. "Why were you worried about Millie's family?" Vash sat down on the bed.  
"Millie's the youngest- their baby. I hurt her. Isn't that reason enough?"  
"It wasn't your fault, and you came back as soon as you could. They know that." Vash pulled off his boots and laid down. "They're happy that she's happy."  
"She really is happy to see me, isn't she?" Wolfwood's voice reflected his amazement.  
"She really is. You're lucky, Wolfwood- to have someone be that happy to see you." Vash's voice was faintly envious.  
"Millie's a great girl. Very-" Wolfwood paused as he searched for the right word. "Open about her feelings. Not everyone is like that."  
"Yeah, that's true." Vash raised an eyebrow. "What are you getting at, preacher man?" Wolfwood took a long drag on his cigarette and smiled faintly.  
"Nothing. Nothing at all..." He looked back out the window. "Vash- where is Knives?"  
"LR town." Vash's face grew faintly cold.  
"What is he doing there? You didn't leave him there? He might..."  
"He can't." Vash looked at Wolfwood. "He... you know that he and I are- something else?"  
"That's obvious, but what?"  
"Plants." Wolfwood blinked. It wasn't that surprising considering some of the things he had seen the twins do- but...  
"You're a plant? But you aren't..."  
"No. Knives and I never entered the spheres. We didn't need them." Vash closed his eyes. "Well, until a year ago. Knives wanted this planet to be an Eden. That's what the plants were for, after all."  
'Do you think someday someone will eat me, Vash?' His brother's voice asked in his mind.  
"So where is he Vash?"  
"In a sphere. His energy is being harvested to rebuild LR. He won't ever leave." Vash was silent for a moment. "You didn't ask how he got there."  
"You two had a big shootout and you used my cross gun to finally nail him." Wolfwood replied absently. He flicked his cigarette out the window and then looked at Vash. "What?"  
"How did you know that?"  
"I... I had a dream, a week or so after they pulled me out... you were on the ground- Knives was going to shoot you with those angel arms.... Tell me it was a dream, Tongari."  
"Did you call out to me to use the gun?"  
"Yeah-"  
"It saved me. Thanks." Vash looked over at him a grinned.  
"But how?"  
"It must've been God." Vash shrugged and Wolfwood laughed.  
"Yeah. That sounds good..."  
  
Meryl ran the brush through her hair. "Thanks for letting me come stay, Millie."  
"It's no problem, Meryl. I'm glad to see you." Millie smiled warmly at her. "How are things at work?"  
"Busy as usual. You aren't missing anything." Meryl smiled back. "It's good to see you so happy."  
"It's like a dream come true. I still can't really believe he's here."  
"He's here. Trust me." Meryl laughed. "There's no way I could've ridden that motorcycle by myself after all." Millie gave her a quick hug.  
"Thank you for bringing him."  
"He brought himself. I just pointed the way."  
"Vash went back to the town to look for us, Meryl." Millie said suddenly. "He was just late. He went to Mr. Wolfwood's orphanage, and he had to take care of Mr. Knives. But he did come back."  
"Did he?" Meryl looked at Millie, violet eyes suddenly shadowed.  
"Uh huh, really Meryl, he did. He didn't forget us."  
"I know Vash wouldn't forget us, Millie. I just thought..." Her voice trailed off. "It's late, we'd better get some sleep," she spoke cheerfully. "You'll want to take Mr. Wolfwood around tomorrow, won't you?"  
  
Meryl woke up early. She got up and dressed and out of the room without waking Millie. Downstairs no one was stirring yet. Meryl went to sit on the back porch. Vash was there ahead of her.  
"Oh, sorry. I didn't think anyone was up yet." Meryl said softly.  
"They aren't. They're all late sleepers, like Millie." Vash smiled at her. "Come join me if you like."  
"I'm not disturbing you?"  
"Not at all," Vash shook his head. Meryl sat down next to him on the stairs.  
"It's nice to see you," Meryl looked down at her hands as she spoke.  
"It's nice to see you too. I missed you." Vash replied easily. "I'm sorry I didn't get back right away..."  
"Millie told me- about the orphanage. But Vash- what about your brother?" Vash told her what he'd told Wolfwood the night before.  
"So, he's taken care of." Meryl was quiet for a few minutes, staring thoughtfully out at the road. Then she looked at Vash, who smiled cheerfully for her.  
"But what about you? I'm kind of surprised you didn't go back to that little girl- Lila? and her grandmother." She smiled at his astonishment. "Wolfwood told me after the sand steamer incident."  
"Ah. Well, I thought about it- I wanted to. But I kept thinking about..." he paused for a moment, "Brad."  
"Brad? The man from the floating city?"  
"Yeah. He said that I- I live outside of time. I'm always the same. The curse of being... what I am. Lila would grow up, her grandmother would grow older and I would stay the same. Always."  
"So what? If they cared about you why would that matter? You can't tell me that you only care about young people..." Vash looked at her, blue eyes meeting violet.  
"It's not that. I would love them no matter what, no matter how old they got. That would never matter to me," he spoke intently, his gaze never leaving hers. "But could they always love me? Wouldn't they resent that I never changed? And then, when they died- might they feel that they should have spent their life with someone who could truly share it with them rather than someone who stood on the outside?" He saw understanding dawn in her eyes.  
"You don't know they'd feel that way. Besides, maybe to them it would be worth it."  
"Maybe. But I would feel like I was cheating them. Like I was taking something that didn't belong to me in the first place. They need to find someone who can truly share their life with them."  
"I see," Meryl bent her head so he wouldn't see the tears springing into her eyes. Vash's voice was gentle, but his words still cut her deeply.  
"I'm so sorry, Meryl. I would change if I could. But I can't be anything than what I am."  
"I know that." Meryl stood up, her back to him. "I understand, but..." She bit back the next words. "Excuse me." She dashed around the corner of the house.  
Vash put his head in his hands. It needed to be said, and he knew it would hurt him to say it, but... he wanted to chase after her- to hell with him being a plant. They could at least enjoy a little time together... But- could he do that to her? Make her resent her mortality, or his immortality? She might hate him for it and that was a terrible thought. He had thought better this little hurt now than a greater one later. But oh- it wasn't a little hurt... it was agony. The look on her face, her pain- it was like a slash across his heart.  
  
He didn't love her. She had known it all along. He cared for her, but he cared for everyone. He had been so gentle with her over this, let her down easily so that she could think that it wasn't really that he didn't love her. Her memory reminded her of all the girls he had flirted with in the towns, Elizabeth, Marianne, Stephanie... He had never done that with her. She had been an annoyance. A thing to be avoided. Then, maybe, a friend. But love? No. Meryl swallowed her tears. She had learned to live without him before. She could do it again. Her heart hurt at the thought. God, she had finally managed it- sort of- and now he was back. How was she going to do this? Seeing him every day here, knowing he was going to vanish into the desert without her again. If only she could leave first... Maybe she could cut her vacation short... Wolfwood was here now, so Millie would be fine. Only a few days in his presence and then she could be off again. Meryl took a deep breath. 'Company face' she told herself. 'Smile over the pain.' 


	4. On the road again

Usual disclaimer: Trigun is not ours.  
  
Wolfwood found Vash on the back porch. "We might have trouble big guy."  
"Huh?" Vash looked up at him and Wolfwood paused at the pain he glimpsed in Vash's eyes before the Stampede hid it.  
"Are you okay?" Vash brightened his expression.  
"I'm fine. What's wrong?" Wolfwood looked at him for a long moment, his eyes telling Vash that the priest didn't believe him a bit.  
"LR town reports odd fluctuations in one of their plants. They're advertising for a specialist to come look at it in case it decides to give up." Wolfwood shrugged. "Happens all the time I know- people are pretty jumpy about losing plants, but given where this one is...."  
"I'd better go check it out."  
"We'll come with you," Millie said from behind him.  
"Millie..."  
"C'mon Mr. Vash, it will be just like the old days... sort of."  
"What will be just like the old days?" Meryl appeared in the doorway. She looked normal, eyes clear, expression calm. How could she look like that? Didn't she care at all? Vash got a grip on himself again as Wolfwood repeated the news. Meryl frowned. "They'll need insurance help if things go wrong."  
"That's our insurance girl," Wolfwood said approvingly. "Always on the case. So, since Meryl's going anyway, Vash, you might as well take her with you."  
"Thanks," said Meryl dryly. She hadn't intended on going with Vash, but back to the agency using the fluctuations as an excuse. She opened her mouth to protest, but Wolfwood was still talking.  
"And since you might need an extra hand out there, Vash, you definitely need to take me."  
"And I'm not letting Nicholas out of my sight ever again," Millie added. "So, Mr. Vash?"  
"You all win." Vash smiled at them. "But how are we going to get there? It's two hundred iles from here. We can't all fit on Wolfwood's bike."  
"Leave that to me," said Millie with a smile. She looked at Meryl. "Won't this be fun Meryl?" Meryl looked at Millie's happy expression and sighed.  
"Yes, Millie, I'm sure it will."  
  
Two hours later they were on the road in one of Millie's big older brother's cars. Her family had packed lots of provisions in the trunk and sent them off with hugs.  
"Your family is amazing," said Wolfwood to Millie as he drove down the road that led out of town.  
"And you didn't meet them all!" Vash told Wolfwood and Meryl about the last few days he'd spent with Millie and her family. Millie added comments and side stories and Wolfwood listened, asking questions and wondering aloud how he was going to keep them all straight. Meryl listened quietly, sunglasses hiding her eyes. Her mouth occasionally curved into a smile at their stories, but she didn't speak.  
"Senpai, are you all right?"  
"'Senpai', Millie? It's been ages since you called me that." Meryl replied, her voice cheerful.  
"Sorry, I guess it's a habit, especially when we're traveling like this." Millie smiled.  
"I know what you mean. I'm fine. I was listening, but I guess I'm a bit tired is all." Meryl shrugged. "The last few days at the office were a bit stressful. I guess it's catching up to me."  
"How can office work be stressful?" Wolfwood asked with a hint of a smirk. "It's not like people are shooting at you."  
"You'd be surprised," Meryl told him, "how many angry customers show up with a gun or two. Why do you think Millie and I had weapons in the first place?"  
"You are kidding," Vash looked at her, concerned.  
"Nope. Oh, the sight of Millie's stungun would usually do the trick." Meryl looked at Millie. "We've really missed you lately! Karen's almost as good with her wristbow, but the stungun is more intimidating. We've had quite a few shootouts since you've left."  
"And I've missed them? Darn." Millie looked sad.  
"Shootouts?" Wolfwood repeated.  
"Sure. Remember Mr. Owden?" Meryl asked Millie.  
"And his double barreled shotgun?" Millie answered. "He caused some serious damage!! He almost hit you- good thing that desk was right there!"  
"Shotgun?" Vash parroted.  
"He came back, the wacko! Wrecked half the office. We had to pull one of those ceiling ambushes."  
"Ooooh! I've missed those!" Millie clapped her hands. "Remember Ms. Tillings and that gatling gun? Or that crazy Mr. what-his- name with the dynamite?"  
"Dynamite?" Wolfwood cringed.  
"Yeah, of course, the explosion knocked Susan out the window. Luckily no one else has come in with explosives lately!" The two men looked stunned as the girls chatted.  
"I had no idea insurance work was that dangerous. Why don't you give it up, Meryl, and find something safer to do?" Wolfwood suggested.  
"And miss all the excitement?" Meryl said, shocked.  
"Excitement?!?!" Vash croaked.  
"Do you think the agency would take me back, Meryl?"  
"Take you back?" Wolfwood protested.  
"Like I said, we miss your stungun." Meryl sighed. "The bow gets messy."  
"MESSY?!?" Vash repeated.  
"I'll send a note to the chief," Millie suggested.  
"Are you crazy?! You can't work in a place like that!" Wolfwood glared at Millie. "Back me up here, Vash!"  
"I think he's right Millie, it doesn't sound safe." Vash looked at Meryl. "For either of you."  
"But that's the fun of it," Millie replied.  
"Fun of it? Gunfighting is not fun!" Wolfwood scolded.  
"But gun rhymes with fun," Meryl said cheerfully as Wolfwood facefaulted and Vash fell over. "It's one of our company mottoes!"  
"And my stun gun is big fun!" Millie chimed in.  
"Gun rhymes with fun?!? AAAARGHHH!!!" Vash shouted, exasperated. "Haven't you two learned anything following me around?!" Vash glared at Meryl as Wolfwood beat his head against the steering wheel. Meryl and Millie burst into giggles.  
"What is so funny!?" Both men demanded.  
"Senpai is teasing you," Millie told them, her giggles starting back up again.  
"Couldn't you tell? I mean really- gun rhymes with fun? Who would be insane enough to work for a company with that motto?" Meryl laughed. "Other than you two of course."  
"We've only ever had one customer show up with a gun and Senpai clocked him with her typewriter." Millie added. Vash looked somewhat relieved. Wolfwood laughed.  
"Now that sounds like a good story. Tell me that one." So Millie did, with Meryl adding occasional comments. That story led into another and another and before long they had to find someplace to stop for the night.  
  
Millie and Meryl were settling into their room, deciding who got what bed and setting the alarm clock. Meryl sat down on the small sofa that was tucked into a corner of the room and grinned at Millie. "Except for the missing typewriter, this is just like the old days."  
"It is. I always liked watching you write reports," Millie replied as she sat down on the bed. "I hope this trip doesn't turn out like some of the others."  
"Me too," Meryl replied with a sudden shiver. "Me too." Millie stood up.  
"I'm going to check on them." Meryl didn't remind her that the men were just across the hall or tell her that they were capable of taking care of themselves. Millie opened the door just as Wolfwood was raising his hand to knock.  
"Uh.. hello ladies. Is everything all right?" Meryl grinned.  
"We're fine."  
"Uh huh, just fine." Millie replied. "I was coming to check on you two."  
"Really? That's great." Wolfwood replied. They looked deeply into each other's eyes and smiled. Meryl rolled her eyes and stood up.  
"Mr. Wolfwood, why don't you keep Millie company while I go find us some dinner, okay?"  
"That's great, thank you Meryl!" Millie replied as Meryl gently pushed Wolfwood into the room and closed the door behind her. She leaned against it with a sigh.  
"Is something wrong?" Vash stood opposite her in the hallway, leaning on his doorframe.  
"No-" Meryl looked over her shoulder at the closed door with a tolerant smile. "I'm sure they'll get better." She looked back at Vash. "I'm on my way to find some dinner- I'll be back in an hour or so."  
"Hour or so? I know this is a big town, but..." Vash looked at the door behind her and grinned. "Ah... right. Why don't I come with you?" 


	5. Wow, Meryl's family

Disclaimer: Trigun and it's characters are not mine. I'm just playing with them for awhile.  
  
"Where are we?" Meryl asked as they strolled through the center of the town. "This place looks familiar..."  
"October Town," Vash replied and then stopped at the look on her face. "What?"  
"In the car- I was so distracted, I didn't realize..." Meryl looked around and smiled. "That's why it's familiar- little things have changed since I've been gone..."  
"Since you've been gone?"  
"This is my hometown, Vash. This is where I grew up." Ah hah, Vash thought. Here's a chance to learn more about Meryl without asking direct questions.  
"Oh. Is there... someplace you want to visit?"  
"Yes, if you don't mind?" Vash shook his head.  
"As long as you don't mind me going with you." He followed Meryl down several side streets. A tiny little house sat wedged between two larger ones. Meryl walked up the steps and knocked cautiously on the door. A tiny wizened little woman opened it.  
"Why Meryl!" The older woman hugged the younger. "It's been ages since we've seen you darlin'!"  
"I know Grandma, I'm sorry."  
"Nothin to be sorry about angel. Birds have to try their wings, and you've been so good about writin." The little woman looked at Vash. "And who is this, dear?"  
"This is a friend of mine, Vash. I know I've written about him."  
"So this is Vash!" The little woman shook his hand warmly. "Well, it's nice to meet you!" She looked at Meryl sorrowfully. "I can't put you up, dear- we've got a full house right now."  
"I know that Grandma. We're staying at the hotel with Millie and another friend of ours. We're heading to LR city."  
"Bless you child. Let me feed you at least! Go run up and say hello to the rest of the family, okay?"  
"We will." Meryl turned to Vash and beckoned him to the staircase. "My grandpa can't leave his room anymore these days without my brother's help," she explained as she walked up the stairs. "So, my brother and his wife and kids live here too, making the house is a bit full." She opened the first door at the top of the stairs and was immediately attacked by two small blond whirlwinds.  
"AUNTIE MERYL!! AUNTIE MERYL!!"  
"Children! Let your aunt breathe!" A petite blond woman rose up from her chair where she had been knitting and hugged Meryl. "It's good to see you, Meryl. Are you here long?"  
"You too Anne. Just for tonight. Is Sam here?"  
"He's working late at the saloon. He'll be mad you missed him."  
"Maybe I'll drop by." Meryl introduced Vash as she hugged her niece and nephew.  
"You two have grown so much!"  
"You always say that Auntie Meryl," the boy grinned at her.  
"Well, it's the truth, Jack. You'll be taller than me soon."  
"How about me, Auntie Meryl?"  
"You too, Sarah." Meryl patted the top of her head.  
"Why don't you children go help Grandma with dinner?" Anne shooed them out of the room.  
"How's Grandpa doing, Anne?"  
"Better, at the moment. He's resting right now. Your father is watching him." Anne's smile was faintly quirked.  
"That's good," Meryl's voice held a hint of hopefulness. "So Dad's..?"  
"Up and moving around. Even swore at Grandma yesterday, just like he used to." Anne shrugged. "It's been 6 months since the accident. Give him time Meryl."  
"I know... it's just..."  
"There was nothing you could do. You've been so good about helping out, sending all those cheerful letters and packages. They've helped, really." Anne hugged her again. "You know he told you not to come back, to go on with your life."  
"I know it." Accident? Meryl hadn't mentioned anything, but she wouldn't have, Vash mused. Curioser and curioser. Something was definitely going on here. Something that might give him more insight into Meryl.  
"Go in and see them." Anne turned her towards the door and gave Vash a cheerful smile. "Introduce this handsome young man to them. That will definitely make them happy." Meryl groaned.  
"Should I let you do this alone, Meryl?" Vash asked her softly in the hallway. After all, he could always listen at the door.  
"No. I'm glad you're here. I'm sorry, this must seem really odd."  
"I guess... but it is your family, so..." Vash was rewarded with the return of her smile.  
"Thanks a lot." Meryl opened another door. Inside an old man was lying in bed reading aloud. His audience was a man seated in the window, a swath of bandages around his eyes.  
"Hey, Grandpa, Daddy." The old man looked up.  
"Meryl! What are you doing here?"  
"Passing through on business," she replied, voice cheerful. "This is my friend, Vash." She hugged the old man and then made her way over to her father. Vash shook hands with the old man.  
"Pleased to meet you, sir."  
"Well, well a friend of Meryl's, are you? Good to meet you!" Meryl's grandfather spoke warmly. Meryl's father hugged her.  
"Are you really here on business, Meryl?"  
"She really is," Vash replied. "She didn't even realize we were in her hometown until we went out looking for dinner."  
"I was tired-" Meryl protested and her father laughed.  
"That sounds like Meryl." He hugged her again. "I wish I could see you honey. How is she looking, Dad?" The old man on the bed chuckled.  
"She's looking well enough." He smiled at Vash. "I'm sure my wife told you that we don't have the room..."  
"She did. We're already checked into the hotel," Vash replied warmly.  
  
"Oh!" Meryl looked at him. "Millie and Wolfwood! I forgot..."  
"Don't worry," Vash grinned at her. "I doubt they've even noticed we're gone. I could tell that they were dying to be alone together all day. Couldn't you?"  
"Yes, that's true..." Meryl smiled. "I doubt they'll even miss dinner."  
"Wolfwood?" Her father asked. "Isn't that the preacher you said Miss Millie had fallen in love with? Didn't he die?" Meryl smiled and began to explain, with Vash helping. In the middle of the explanation, they got called down to dinner. Vash carried Meryl's Grandfather downstairs easily. Meryl's family was warm and friendly, adjusting easily to Vash and making him feel welcome, just as Millie's had. But Meryl's family was not like Millie's family. They obviously loved each other, but there were hints of things not spoken, secrets hidden beneath the surface. Underneath their happiness at being together was an undercurrent of sadness, of strength in adversity, of toughness. Like Meryl herself. He watched her across the table as she talked, her big violet eyes sparkling. She was beautiful here, surrounded by those she loved, happy in a way he'd never seen her. He regretted it when Anne looked at the clock and said she had to get the children to bed.  
"Let Vash take me up and then you two should get back to the hotel." Her grandfather directed. Vash carried the old man easily up the stairs and into his room.  
"Is this okay?"  
"It's fine, thank you very much." Meryl's grandfather looked at Vash. "You love my granddaughter, don't you?"  
"Yes," Vash replied, startled into honesty.  
"I could tell by the way you watched her at dinner. I used to watch her grandmother like that. I'm glad you love her- you seem like a decent man." Meryl's grandfather's voice grew husky. "Take care of her. She's a lot like her mother- and I... I don't want to lose another one."  
"What- what do you mean, sir?"  
"Has Meryl told you how her mother died?"  
"No sir."  
"Well, it was recent- about 6 months ago. She'll tell you in her own time... She's waiting for you, son. You'd better go."  
"Good night sir." Vash went downstairs, his emotions confused and tangled.  
  
Meryl waved to her family one more time, her other hand holding a basket of food for Wolfwood and Millie.  
"It's 8:30," Vash looked at his watch. "We left the hotel at 5:30ish... think they've noticed we haven't come back yet?"  
"Maybe," Meryl grinned at him.  
"Do you want to stop in and see your brother?"  
"Just for a brief second," Meryl told him. "The saloon is probably busy this time of night. It's on the way back though."  
  
The saloon was busy. Meryl simply pushed her way through, ignoring the comments and insults sent her way. Vash followed her like a barge in the wake of a small tugboat.  
"MERRIE!" the bartender tossed his rag down and leaped over the bar, sweeping Meryl up in a hug. He was as huge as Meryl was petite. He was at least a few inches taller than Vash and built like a rock wall. He had dark hair and big violet eyes, just like Meryl did. "Did you see the folks?"  
"Of course. Your kids are getting big!"  
"Obviously! They take after me!" Her brother hugged her again and set her down. He turned a cool eye on Vash. "And who is this, little sister?"  
"One of my business associates," Meryl replied, knowing that saying Vash's name in here would be like waving a red flag in front of a bull. "We're just passing through on our way to LR City."  
"Stop in on the way back," Sam replied, as the customers at the bar started hollering for him. "I'm coming... I'm coming! Can't a guy say hi to his sister?!"  
  
"So, that was my family," Meryl said as they left the bar and headed back to the hotel.  
"I liked them," Vash told her honestly. She smiled back.  
"Even my brother? He was a bit rude."  
"Nah, just protective. Besides, don't you realize what ammunition he gave me, 'Merrie'?" Meryl groaned.  
  
Meryl looked at her door with a faint smile.  
"What is it?" Vash asked her softly.  
"No lights underneath and the door's locked."  
"They must've gone out to eat. Don't you have a key?"  
"No," Meryl sighed. "I left it with Millie." She handed him the basket of food.  
"What are you going to do?"  
"Sleep in the car. If they get back have Millie come get me."  
"Don't be silly." Vash opened his door. "You can sleep on Wolfwood's bed, or we have a perfectly nice couch if you're worried he's contaminated the bed." That made Meryl giggle.  
"Thanks," Meryl grabbed a blanket from Wolfwood's bed. "I'll take the couch. Just in case he comes back and... well, I don't want to be on the receiving end of Millie's stungun."  
"Who would?" Vash tossed her a shirt. "Here, you can sleep in this, and I'll even let you have the bathroom first."  
"Thank you." Meryl disappeared towards the bathroom.  
  
Vash woke up in the middle of the night. He opened his eyes and looked towards Wolfwood's bed. Empty. The door was closed, the basket of food still on the table. The sound came again, a soft choked noise. He swung his head around. Meryl had been asleep when he got out of the shower, a tiny compact bundle curled under the blanket on the couch. Now she was sitting up, leaning against the cushions, crying softly into her hands.  
  
Meryl felt an arm slide around her shoulders and she leaned against him automatically.  
"What's wrong?" His voice was warm, concerned.  
"I'm sorry, Vash, I didn't mean to wake you..." Meryl wiped her tears with a corner of the blanket.  
"It's all right. Can you tell me?"  
"It's just... it was the first time I've gone home and Mother wasn't there to greet me. And Daddy with those bandages..." She let out a soft sob.  
"It must have been hard."  
"Daddy won't ever be able to see again. It will be harder for him. At least... at least most of the burns are gone...."  
"What happened to him?" Meryl looked up at Vash.  
"My mother... she... He hurt his eyes in the fire that killed my mother." Meryl looked away. She drew in several deep breaths and Vash knew that she wasn't telling him everything.  
"It must've been a bad fire."  
"It was...she... she set it." Vash's arm tightened around her shoulders.  
"Why? How?"  
"Dad said he woke up and she was gone...so he went looking for her...she was outside...she had drenched herself with oil... and ..she lit it... He tried to stop her... she flung her arm out...it caught him across the face...." Tears streaked down her cheeks.  
"I'm sure she didn't mean to hurt him..."  
"Yes she did." Meryl looked up into Vash's eyes. "She did mean to, that's just it." She frowned. "My father thought they had come to an understanding. He... he was in love with someone else. He and his lover didn't want to break up their families, so they just..." Meryl bit her lip. "He thought my mother was fine with it. She didn't seem upset or angry, she just accepted it... But that wasn't it. She just couldn't talk about it- she was afraid of telling him that she loved him. Afraid he would truly leave her... so she said nothing. She just suffered."  
"And then, she just couldn't take it anymore?" Vash asked softly.  
"I guess not. Her note said that she felt like she was blazing with anger, hate and jealousy. She was worried that she was going to kill my father... so she killed herself instead..." Meryl covered her face with her hands. "If I had only been there- if I had just known!"  
"Did your grandparents know about your father's lover?" Meryl shook her head.  
"No one knew."  
"So if you had been there, how would it have been different?"  
"I might've noticed something! I might've been able to do something for her!"  
"Or you might not have. Your mother made her own choice. She did what she felt was right."  
"I'm surprised," Meryl looked at him. "I know you disapprove of suicide more than anything."  
"I do. Taking a life is never right. But maybe she saw it as a sacrifice. She must've loved him very much." Vash hoped he had said the right thing.  
"She did." Meryl wiped her face on the blanket again. "Thank you for listening, Vash. I'm sorry I woke you."  
"Anytime," he leaned his head against hers for a minute, arm tightening in a hug. "I'm always here for you."  
"I know. Thank you." She smiled up at him, but her smile lacked something and now Vash realized how Wolfwood could tell when Vash used his false smile so easily. "I'm fine now Vash. We should get back to sleep. Did Wolfwood come back?"  
"No. Bet we see him in the morning." Vash gave her shoulders another faint squeeze and stood up. "Good night."  
"Good night, Vash. Thank you." Meryl lay back down on the couch and closed her eyes. Vash went back to bed and spent some time staring at the ceiling, his thoughts troubled.  
  
Someone was banging on the door. Wolfwood stumbled out of bed, grabbed some clothes and opened the door. A huge oxlike man glared at him.  
"You aren't my sister."  
"For which I am profoundly grateful. You must have the wrong room." The man looked at the number next to the door and frowned.  
"The front desk told me that my sister Meryl was in this room. Is she?" Meryl? Wolfwood looked at the ox again, noting the hair and eye colors, as well as the fierce tilt to the chin. Shit. Should he admit to knowing Meryl or not?  
"You must be Sam," Millie had come to stand behind Wolfwood, her smile cheerful as she finished tying her robe.  
"Yes, but who are you?"  
"Millie. Millie Thompson. I used to work with Meryl? This is Nicholas D. Wolfwood." So much for trying to claim they didn't know Meryl. Sam looked at them suspiciously.  
"Meryl might've mentioned you. Where is she?"  
"I really don't know." Millie's smile remained cheerful even as Sam glared at her. "She went out with Mr. Vash and never came back." At this moment, the door behind Sam opened and Vash stepped into the hallway. Wolfwood cursed his timing. "Good morning, Mr. Vash. This is Meryl's brother Sam. He's looking for Meryl; have you seen her?" Millie's eyes widened as Sam picked Vash up in one fist.  
"Where is my sister?" Vash didn't reply as he thought the phrase 'in my room' might not be the best response.  
"Uh...well..." Nope, 'getting dressed' was worse. Maybe he could fake amnesia?  
"Answer me."  
"Well, I can see where Meryl gets her charming personality," Wolfwood commented as he leaned against the doorframe. "Though she tends to hit, not choke."  
"Let's not give him any ideas, Wolfwood," Vash hissed.  
"I'm waiting!" Sam lifted Vash a bit higher.  
"Sam!" Meryl's voice cut through the air. "Put him down! What are you doing?"  
"I could ask you the same thing, little sister!" Sam turned to glare at Meryl. "I come up here and this... half dressed man answers the door of the room you are supposed to be in! Then he claims that you never came back last night...."  
"Actually I said that," Millie interjected.  
"Then they tell me you were with this guy last night..." Sam shook Vash. "And here you are in his room this morning! What am I supposed to think?" Meryl reached out and pinched Sam's arm, making him drop Vash.  
"As I am an adult, brother, it doesn't really matter what you think." Meryl's voice was cool. "After all, I never asked you to explain to Mother and Grandma about that night up by Mt. Halo...." Her voice trailed off and her brother flushed.  
"But Merrie...." Meryl stepped back and pointed to the sofa.  
"I slept there, brother. I forgot my key and didn't want to wake Millie. That's all." The couch was rumpled, a blanket scrunched up into a corner.  
"That still doesn't explain this guy..." Her brother muttered as he looked at Wolfwood. "But okay, Merrie." He handed her another covered basket. "Grandma sent breakfast. Leave the baskets with the clerk downstairs, I'll get them later. I've got to get to work."  
"Tell her thank you." Meryl hugged her brother and he walked downstairs after casting one more dubious look at Wolfwood and Vash.  
"Sheesh Meryl. What a charmer," Wolfwood grinned at her.  
"One comment about it running in the family and you're dead, preacher man." Meryl grinned back. "Just be happy he isn't Millie's brother."  
"I am, believe me, I am." Then he raised an eyebrow at her. "'Merrie'?"  
  
Over breakfast Vash and Meryl told the other two about their visit to Meryl's family. Then they packed up and headed out again. Vash was driving today, so Meryl shared the front seat with him and Millie and Wolfwood stretched out in the back.  
"Is safe to have you drive?" Meryl teased.  
"Is it safe to have you sitting next to me?" He replied. "I remember the last time you sat next to me when I drove."  
"I don't...." Meryl looked puzzled.  
"Remember when you threatened to shoot me when we were with that caravan?" Vash asked Meryl as they headed out of town. This started off a spate of 'do you remembers'? That lasted for a few hours. After that Millie made them sing any songs they could remember to pass the time. They stopped at a small way station and shared their lunch with a father and his two young sons who were heading towards October City.  
After lunch, Wolfwood and Millie slept as Vash drove. Meryl was quiet, her head leaning on her arm, letting the wind ruffle her hair.  
"How much longer?" She asked Vash.  
"We won't reach it today," he replied. "We'll have to stop in Tonim for the night."  
"Tonim... but that's where..." She glanced at the backseat.  
"Exactly. We're close now." He glanced at her, his eyes hidden by his sunglasses. "Let's hope history doesn't repeat itself." Vash looked thoughtful. "But if we are going to pass through it- there's something we need to do."  
  
Wolfwood woke up as the car stopped. He blinked and sat up. Millie was already awake, her face tight and still. "Millie?"  
"Just give me a moment," Vash got out of the car. "I'll be right back." He walked into the church they'd stopped in front of. Wolfwood recoiled into his seat as he recognized it.  
"We're in Tonim, aren't we?" His eyes strayed to the churchyard where rows of crosses marked the burial grounds. "Oh no...." He could feel the dirt in his mouth, in his throat, choking him. His hands curved into claws. He closed his eyes tightly. "I can't... I can't be here..." Millie's arms enclosed him. Meryl leaned over the seat, concerned. Wolfwood shook, his memories enfolding him. He could feel the press of the dirt around him and he whimpered. Millie spoke gently:  
"It's all right... you're okay...."  
"No..." he took a strangled breath.  
"Yes. You're alive, you're fine, I'm with you..." Millie's voice soothed him. "Breathe..." He tried to breathe for her, tried to reach the peaceful place that Millie always provided him with, but the horrors in his head wouldn't be soothed.  
"I can't... the dirt... I'm not dead...can't get out... too weak... can't breathe... can't breathe!" He was gasping now, nearly hyperventilating with his fear. Millie's eyes met Meryl's in horrified comprehension. Vash had returned and was standing by the car, also horror- struck.  
"Nicholas?"  
"Wolfwood?" The preacher couldn't hear them. His breath was getting shallower, more panicked.  
"Buried... the dirt...let me out...please...."  
"Nicholas, you have to breathe!" Millie said shrilly, but his breath kept coming in little gasps, his pupils wide and dilated. Meryl closed her eyes for a moment, then reached forward and pulled Wolfwood out of Millie's grip. With her other hand, she slapped him full across the face.  
"Snap out of it, idiot!" Meryl scolded and slapped him again. Wolfwood took a deep breath, surprise replacing fear.  
"Meryl!!" Millie's voice was shocked and Vash had already reached out to pull her away, his hand tightening on her arm, anger on his face. But Wolfwood's eyes were focused again and his breathing had calmed. Meryl released him. Wolfwood's hand touched his cheek where the imprint of her hand burned redly.  
"Thanks insurance girl. I needed that."  
"Any excuse to hit you, preacher man." She looked up at Vash, eyes narrowing. He took his hand away. Meryl sat back down in her seat.  
"I'm all right, Millie," Wolfwood put his arm around the girl next to him. "It was just a bit of a shock to wake up and be here, I guess." He looked up at Vash. "And just why are we stopped here?"  
"I thought you might want this." Vash bent over and picked up a huge cross wrapped in cloth. "I took it back here after the fight with Knives." He dropped it into the backseat and Wolfwood caught it easily. Vash got back in the car and started the engine.  
"It's heavier than I remember," Wolfwood said as he caressed the familiar shape.  
"That's because it's so full of mercy," Vash replied.  
  
At the inn, Wolfwood and Millie went in to make the arrangements as the other two stood outside.  
"It's good to see people here again," Meryl said. "It was a little creepy last time."  
"Huh?" Vash had been looking towards the plant. Was it his imagination or had it blinked once when he'd looked at it? He looked again, but the light was burning steadily. He'd check it in the morning.  
"There he goes again, off in his own little world..." Meryl muttered and turned her back on him.  
"Did you say something?" Vash turned his gaze on her. The line of her back was stiff. 'She's furious.' he thought.  
"Nothing important."  
"Meryl?" She turned and looked at him, surprised by his use of her name. "I wanted to apologize- for earlier. I should've known you were trying to help Wolfwood. I'm sorry." Her violet eyes got a bit bigger.  
"It's all right. You were scared. So was I." Meryl paused as Wolfwood and Millie reappeared.  
"Here we go..." He handed out the keys. 


	6. Knives appears

Disclaimer: Trigun isn't mine. A HUGE thank you to all of you that reviewed! You are awesome!!  
  
"Wow, so you decided to have dinner with us tonight?" Vash teased as he met Millie and Wolfwood in the hallway.  
"Hey, last time Meryl said she'd be back with dinner. We waited." Wolfwood replied. "Speaking of which, where is Meryl?"  
"I'm here." Meryl opened her door. "My head is splitting for some reason. I think I'll just stay here." Vash studied her carefully.  
"Do you want us to bring you something Meryl?" Millie asked. Meryl turned paler.  
"No thanks, I don't think I could eat right now." Meryl disappeared back into her room and the other three headed out to eat.  
Vash had intended to check on Meryl when he got back to the hotel, but somehow he ended up in a drinking contest with the other two. It was very late when they got back to their rooms. Vash promised himself that he'd check on Meryl first thing in the morning.  
  
There was someone pounding on his door. Vash raised his eyelids and groaned. What now? He pulled himself from the bed and went to lean on the door.  
"Who is it?"  
"Mr. Vash? It's Millie! Please open up!" Vash opened the door, responding to the utter panic in her tone. She pushed past him into the room and looked around it with wide, frightened eyes.  
"Millie, what is it? What's wrong?"  
"Meryl's not in here with you?' Vash flushed.  
"Of course not...." He muttered.  
"I went to her room this morning and she wasn't there. The room's a mess and Meryl never leaves it a mess... not ever..oh, Mr. Vash do you think something happened to her?" Millie's voice got more and more distraught.  
"Millie, relax. I'm sure she's fine..." Vash attempted to calm the frightened woman, but Wolfwood interrupted him.  
"Vash, come take a look at this." Wolfwood leaned in the door, his calm cracking a bit at the edges. "Now."  
  
Millie had a talent for understatement, thought Vash as he looked at Meryl's room. A mess was not making your bed, or leaving your clothes around. Meryl's room was not a mess, it was a disaster. The bed was overturned, the mattress slashed open in several places. Papers, clothes and furniture lay scattered.  
"And she always seemed like such a neat freak." Vash commented as his eyes scanned the room.  
"How can you joke like that, Mr. Vash?" Millie scolded, her eyes teary.  
"It's just his way," Wolfwood reassured her. His boot touched the mattress and flipped it over. "Oh no..." The mattress had a large reddish stain on it, slowly drying to brown. Vash knelt next to it.  
"Why didn't I hear anything? I was right next door."  
"Maybe it happened while we were at dinner?" Millie suggested, frightened.  
"Can you tell if it's hers?' Wolfwood asked.  
"Do I look like a forensic scientist?" Vash retorted.  
"What's that?"  
"Never mind," Vash frowned, panic was flaring deep inside him and he struggled to keep it down. Meryl needed him to be focused now.  
"Mr. Vash?" Millie's voice broke his concentration. "Look." She was standing by the desk, the only piece of furniture upright in the room. On the desk was an apple with a knife stuck through it, pinning it to the table.  
  
Vash didn't remember leaving the hotel, he only remembered running from the room, fetching his gun, looking for his brother. How could he have done this? He couldn't leave the sphere! But then again, he and Knives shouldn't have been able to be outside the spheres at all... He let his senses expand, hoping for a clue. 'Up' his brain told him. 'He'll be up high somewhere....'  
  
The man standing on the cliff waiting for him was not Knives. He was short and compact, his hair a dark brown. Blood stained his right shoulder. Another Gung-ho gun? Vash thought, but the man turned around and Vash froze. "Hey Vash," he said in Knives's voice, his eyes the same bright blue. "I knew you'd be showing up soon. Miss your little insurance girl, hm?" How the hell had he done this?  
"What did you do to her?"  
"I didn't do anything to her."  
"Liar," Vash snapped.  
"No really, I didn't. I did take her, that's true. But..." his voice trailed off into silence. His eyes darted back and forth, sweat beading his brow.  
"Answer my question." Vash's gun was out, steadily pointed at the man on the cliff's edge. His glasses shaded his eyes, but his mouth was tight with tension. Knives's eyes studied him for a moment.  
"The gun won't really help you Vash. This man is just a carrier. I'm controlling him. He's innocent and you don't kill the innocent... or the guilty either." Vash holstered his gun, but kept his hand on it.  
"Where is she? Tell me!"  
"I'm not surprised you're upset. She reminded me of Rem too-" Vash noted his brother's use of the past tense and his eyes narrowed. "Such a lovely girl...."  
"You haven't answered me, Knives. Tell me what you did to her." The anger was heavy in his voice now, making the words clipped and hard. He knew what Knives had done to Rem. Please, please let Meryl be okay...  
"She wouldn't shut up," his brother turned away from him, back to the cliff's edge. "She kept telling me you wanted a peaceful life, how good and kind you were... it was sickening..." He shivered.  
"It would be- to you."  
"I told her she was delusional, that her fixation on you was making her blind to the killing machine that lived inside you." He laughed suddenly. "She said you only used your weapons to help people, not to hurt them- even if they deserved it. She said that didn't sound like a killing machine to her. She said I was the delusional one. She was quite a spitfire."  
"Was?" Vash managed, his heart sinking at the word. His brother's voice changed, he spoke softly, almost reverently as he twisted the knife:  
"She obviously loved you, Vash. Just like Rem did. She told me she'd do anything, if only I'd leave you alone, anything at all to help you live a peaceful life...." Vash felt the tears gather at the corners of his eyes, but he wouldn't let them fall- not yet.  
"Knives..." he growled.  
"I gave her a choice. I would let her go, but it meant that I could continue our little game. Or- she could give up her life for yours and I would let you live in peace for what would have been the rest of her lifespan- 50 years or so... just an eye blink to us, hm?" Vash felt cold. He knew what Meryl would choose. Her grandfather's voice echoed in his head. 'She's a lot like her mother...'  
"No! You didn't- she..."  
"She agreed. She didn't even argue with me. She drew one of those silly little guns of hers," Knives paused for a moment. "I thought she'd try to shoot me, but she placed it against her temple," his finger touched the side of his forehead. "And stood here at the edge of the cliff." His voice slowed. "She...smiled... She looked so happy..." His voice had deepened for a moment, his eyes fading into brown. Then they brightened back to blue and his voice resumed it's frantic pitch:  
"I reminded her that you disapproved of suicide more than anything, but she just smiled. 'It's a sacrifice, not suicide,' she said." Vash took in a sharp breath. Knives shook his head. "I asked her how she could be sure that I would hold to my side of the bargain. She just smiled more- she said she had to hope I would- that my love for you would let her do this small thing to make you happy."  
"Oh no...no..." Vash closed his eyes, tears stinging the lids. He couldn't cry yet. Not yet. Knives turned and looked at him. Oh yes- Vash was suffering. And it was going to get worse. Much worse... Knives smiled.  
"She bought you 50 years of peace, brother. Enjoy them."  
"Peace bought with her blood," Vash answered, opening his eyes and glaring at his brother. "How can I enjoy that?"  
"Peace is a dear commodity," Knives turned his back again. "It always comes at a high price." The two brothers were quiet for a moment. Then Knives spoke, his voice mocking, hateful: "Aren't you going to do something Vash? Swear that you'll come and kill me, push this fool off the cliff, something? Anything? Haven't I caused you enough pain, yet? Or is her loss not a great one after all? Was she just a stupid little girl in love with someone who didn't give a damn about her?" Vash snarled.  
"She bought me 50 years of peace. I'm not going to throw it away by starting the fight with you again. I wouldn't cheapen her sacrifice like that." Vash took a deep breath, eyes glowing a bright blue. "But when the 50 years are over, brother, you'll pay for her death!" He ground out, teeth clenched. Knives laughed then.  
"Ah, a flash of rage! Finally! In that case, you win- this time," he said. "Look behind that rock over there after I go. Make sure she gets a decent burial. Rem didn't." He jumped off the cliff.  
"NO!" Vash hadn't expected that. He should've seen it coming! Knives hadn't been able to keep complete control over that man. Vash looked over the edge of the cliff. Far away he saw a small crumpled body. There was no way the man could've survived. Knives had been out to kill.  
Vash looked towards the rock and let the pain swirl out of his heart. Now he had time to mourn. He took a deep breath and walked over to the rock. Meryl's body was curled on it's side, a thin trickle of blood was drying on the side of her face. Her eyes were closed and Vash was glad. He didn't want to look into them. Meryl had become another victim of Vash the Stampede. He bent down and gathered her body up into his arms, cradling her head against his cheek. A tear slid down his face and into her hair.  
"I'm so sorry Meryl. I failed you." He remembered how Meryl's grandfather had asked him to take care of her. How was he going to face her family and tell them that she was dead? He heard the clatter of footsteps up the rock face behind him and knew Wolfwood and Millie had finally caught up to him. He turned to face them, heard Millie's gasp of dismay, saw the stricken look in Wolfwood's eyes.  
"Mr. Vash? What happened to her? Meryl is okay, isn't she?"  
"She's dead." Tears were sliding down his face unheeded.  
"Oh no..no..it can't..no..." Millie's voice broke.  
"She sacrificed herself for me. She bought me 50 years of peace with her life." Vash's voice was empty. Wolfwood touched his shoulder as Millie's arms embraced her friend. "Knives said she smiled as she did it. She didn't even fight him..." Vash's arms released Meryl into Millie's. "Why? Why would she do this?"  
"She loved you Vash." Wolfwood spoke softly. "She wanted to help you."  
"I didn't want this!!"  
"Mr. Vash, you wanted to be left in peace, didn't you?" Millie countered as she touched Meryl's temple. Her eyes widened.  
"Not at the cost of her life! Rem sacrificed herself too! Why? Why them and not me? Why do they have to pay? It's not fair!! She's gone and I have to stay!" He struck out blindly, crushing the rock with the force of his blow. "I have to go on alone! Without Rem- without Meryl... Always alone!" He covered his face with his hands, barely registering the hand that touched his shoulder.  
"Vash- you're only alone if..." Wolfwood started.  
"Nicholas! Mr. Vash!" Millie's voice cut him off. Vash stayed- eyes squeezed closed as Wolfwood turned to Millie.  
"Millie- not..." Millie had placed Meryl on the ground, her fingers tight on her senpai's wrist.  
"Nicholas- please... feel- tell me I'm not imagining it." Wolfwood's fingers replaced Millie's.  
"A pulse... she's still alive?"  
"I can't find a bullet wound either- just this bump..." Wolfwood was shoved out of the way by Vash. He touched Meryl's throat gently, then examined her temples.  
"We've got to get her back to town." 


	7. Sharing life

Disclaimer: I don't own Trigun. I'm just borrowing the characters for awhile. I'll return them good as new- promise!!  
  
Meryl's head hurt. She didn't think people were supposed to have headaches in the afterlife, but then again, she might be wrong. Her hand touched her temple and she winced. That hurt all right. She remembered placing the gun next to her temple, and then... then he had leaped at her, his hand closing over hers, turning the gun so the stock... ah. He had knocked her out- that cheating bastard! Was he trying to get out of the bargain? She'd see about that! But first-  
Meryl opened her eyes. A pair of icy blue eyes were looking into hers. The eyes were narrowed- cold and angry looking. "Mr. Knives?" she faltered, ideas of smacking the double-crossing jerk fading from her mind.  
"No. It's me." Vash's voice answered as she focused on his dark blond hair. She closed her eyes again. "How are you feeling?"  
"My head hurts." She could still feel him glaring at her. His voice was angry too, she thought.  
"I'm not surprised. You've got quite a bump. Open your eyes so I can see if...."  
"No."  
"No?"  
"Not until you stop looking at me that way. It hurts. If you want to glare put on your glasses or something. Please?"  
"I'm sorry Meryl," Vash's tone changed from angry to contrite. "You really had me worried. I thought you were dead."  
"No. He hit me with my derringer. What a jerk!" Meryl's eyes opened again, blazing with fury.  
"You were going to shoot yourself."  
"I know. We had a deal. Of course he tried to get out of it."  
"No, he didn't." Vash smiled faintly. "He told me that I had 50 years of peace- thanks to you."  
"Really? He must've known I wasn't... huh." Meryl touched her temple and frowned at the pain. "Maybe he wanted me to do it later? I guess this would give me time to get some things settled- put my affairs in order and all..." She wondered aloud.  
"You aren't going to do it at all." Vash countered icily. "Understand?"  
"But Vash, I made a deal...." Vash leaned over her threateningly.  
"I don't give a damn! Listen to me: You are not going to do this! Got it?"  
"What are you so mad about?" Meryl squinted at him.  
"What?!" Vash sputtered for a moment. "What am I so mad about?! Why the HELL WOULDN'T I BE MAD?!?!" His voice rose louder and louder as he spoke.  
"Don't yell," Meryl touched her forehead and winced. "It hurts."  
"Mr. Vash," Millie's voice was calm and soothing, but her grip on his shoulder was firm. "Why don't you go outside with Nicholas? You can yell at Meryl when she's feeling better, okay? Right now she needs to rest."  
"But..." Vash found himself outside the room before he realized it. Wolfwood was leaning against the wall, smoking.  
"Don't argue with Millie, it's not healthy." Wolfwood said matter-of- factly. "She's right. You can yell at Meryl later."  
"I wasn't yelling."  
"Of course not, Vash." Wolfwood gave him an amused look. "Just speaking loudly, right?" Vash leaned against the wall and closed his eyes.  
"I don't understand that girl at all," Vash muttered.  
  
"Are you feeling better, Meryl?" Millie asked as she sat down on the bed. "Your eyes are a bit dilated- you probably have a concussion. We'll call the doctor."  
"I'm fine." Meryl grumbled as she propped herself up against the headboard. "Hey, this isn't my room."  
"I'm afraid Mr. Knives trashed your room a bit. I'll get it cleaned up. This is Mr. Vash's room."  
"Why was he so upset, Millie? I thought he'd be happy to have Knives leave him in peace for awhile...." Millie sighed.  
"Really Meryl, do you think Mr. Vash wants peace so much that he'd let you die for it?"  
"Let me? It was my choice, not his."  
"I said that too, but he said it wasn't worth it." She looked straight into Meryl's eyes. "Mr. Vash was very upset when he thought you were dead. So please, be patient with him?" Meryl nodded, winced at the pain, and grimaced.  
"All right Millie."  
"Your head hurts a lot?"  
"Yes." Millie got up from the bed and opened the door. "Meryl's head really hurts and her eyes are dilated. Can one of you go get a doctor?"  
"I can help her," Meryl heard Vash say quietly. "I won't yell, I promise."  
"All right," Millie agreed. "Nicholas, can you help me clean up her room?"  
"Of course," Millie stepped out and Vash stepped back in. The door closed behind him. He sat down next to Meryl and gently put his hands on her head. His fingers slid gently over the bump on her temple, making Meryl wince.  
"It doesn't feel cracked here," he murmured, his hands sliding up and over her head.  
"Ow!" Vash's fingers had found another tinier bump on the back of her head.  
"That's where you hit the ground."  
"It hurts."  
"I imagine it does. Do you remember your name?"  
"Huh?"  
"You don't?"  
"Of course I do. Meryl Stryfe."  
"And I am?"  
"Vash the Stampede."  
"Where are you from?"  
"October Town." Meryl frowned at him. "Why are you asking me these questions?"  
"Just making sure the fall didn't rattle something important. Can you count to ten?"  
"1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10." Meryl recited. "How do I know you aren't just fooling around?"  
"You don't." Vash smiled at her. "You'll just have to trust me." His fingers were still in her hair, gently caressing and Meryl felt the pain begin to ease. "What happened to us on the sand steamer?"  
"Which one? The one with BDN or the one with the feud over the satellite?"  
"Good," Vash replied. "You remember both." The pain was definitely lessening.  
"Of course. It's hard to forget being hijacked, running around with guns and explosions like that."  
"Which time was that?"  
"Both times." Meryl smiled. "But it was the second time that we heard you singing that awful song about slaughtering people." Vash laughed.  
"Yeah, I was trying to scare them. You know- be Vash the Stampede." His fingers continued their circling. "Is the pain less?"  
"Yes. How are you doing that?"  
"It's amazing what you pick up over the years." Vash smiled at her. "Your pupils are going back to normal. You'll want to go to sleep, but you can't for awhile."  
"I know," Meryl sighed. "I've had a concussion before. When they did let me sleep I had to be woken up every hour on the hour. It sucked."  
"I know- but we'll do it. How'd you get a concussion before?"  
"My brother told me girls couldn't climb trees. So I climbed one."  
"And proved him right by falling out of it."  
"Yes, but then I got up and climbed it anyway."  
"With a concussion?" Vash was amazed.  
"I didn't know I had one. I was a stubborn child."  
"That explains a lot." He muttered.  
"What did you say?"  
"Nothing." Millie poked her head in.  
"We cleaned the room but the mattress is a lost cause. We'll have to get another room."  
"No need," Vash replied as Meryl groaned. "Meryl has to have somebody watch her tonight. She can stay here."  
"But you won't get any sleep if you're watching her, Mr. Vash. Don't you want me to help you?"  
"I'll be fine. I'll sleep tomorrow and you can watch her then, okay?"  
"Okay!" Millie nodded. "We'll go get you some dinner."  
"Thanks." Vash looked at Meryl as the door closed. "No arguments?"  
"Why would I?" Meryl replied.  
"I can think of at least three that I expected you to come up with."  
"Can any of them be countered with wanting to leave Millie and Wolfwood with some time together?" Vash was silent for a moment.  
"Mostly, yeah. But what harm will one night apart do?"  
"And what if tomorrow is our last day?" Vash tilted her head up so she was looking into his eyes.  
"Today was almost yours." Meryl smiled.  
"I know, but yesterday was a good day. We had a good time traveling- you and Wolfwood telling jokes, Millie making us sing all those old songs, sharing our lunch with that family on the road. It would've been a nice last day."  
"Meryl...." Vash's hands let her go.  
"Yes, when Knives took me...That wasn't nice. I was scared. Really scared." Meryl twisted the blankets in her hands. "He's hurt you so many times- I couldn't let him hurt you more- not when I could do something to stop it. It seemed like such a little thing..."  
"A little thing?" Vash repeated. "Meryl- don't you think it would hurt me to lose you?" Meryl looked up at him, eyes wide, surprise evident on her face. Why did she look surprised? Vash wondered. I told her I loved her- sort of.  
"Well, I... I knew you'd be upset. You're upset anytime Knives kills someone because of you. But 50 years of peace..."  
"Is not worth your life!" Oops, volume. Vash frowned at her and changed the subject. "How does your head feel now?"  
"Still hurts but not as bad." Meryl touched the base of her skull gently with her fingertips. "Really bad here."  
"Here let me..." Vash moved so that he was sitting behind her. "Now where does it hurt?" Vash's fingers followed hers, working slowly and gently to soothe away the remaining pains. Meryl sighed in relief and relaxed only to straighten again with a hiss of pain. "What?"  
"I forgot, when he grabbed me..." Meryl touched her lower back. "He punched me right there. I think he was trying for a stomach shot but I turned at the last moment." Vash tugged her shirt out of her skirt, exposing her back. "Hey!"  
"It's bruised." Vash said as he touched it lightly. "Did he hit you anyplace else?"  
"I don't think so."  
"You aren't sure?" Vash stood up, tugging her with him.  
"Hey!"  
"Relax. I'm walking you to the bathroom. Go in, check yourself and clean up. I'll wait out here." Meryl made it to the bathroom okay and closed the door. She hastily stripped, checking out the bruise in the mirror. She had to lean against the sink as a wave of dizziness washed over her.  
"Yuck." There were some small circular bruises on her arms that puzzled her until she remembered that was where Knives had grabbed her. There were a few long scratches on her legs from the bushes he dragged her through. On the whole she had gotten off lightly. There was a tap on the door. Meryl grabbed a towel and wrapped herself in it.  
"It's me, Millie."  
"Oh, come in." Millie slid in with Meryl's case and her nightgown.  
"Vash said you were getting cleaned up so I brought these in. We have dinner too, but I'll make sure they don't eat your part."  
"Thanks Millie."  
"You look a bit white, Meryl." Millie's hands caught her as the room started to spin again. "Sit down." She lowered Meryl to the edge of the tub.  
"I'm fine Millie. Go eat."  
"But Meryl..."  
"I'll be fine. I'll call if I need you, okay?" Millie left after a few doubtful looks. Meryl carefully got a wet washcloth and cleaned herself up, stopping several times to let the dizziness pass. She managed to get her nightgown on and close up her case again but bending over the case set her head spinning again. She knelt down on the floor and pressed her head against the cabinets. Maybe she needed to call Millie to help her up again. Suddenly hands touched her shoulders.  
"Meryl! Meryl?"  
"Vash?" He was bent over her as Millie stood in the doorway. His arms scooped her up off the floor. She leaned against him gratefully as he picked her up. "I'm really dizzy."  
"Does your head hurt?"  
"No. It doesn't hurt. It's just spinning." She closed her eyes and slid her arms around him. "Don't drop me."  
"I won't." He carried her over to the bed and sat down, holding her on his lap.  
"Is she all right?" Millie asked.  
"She shouldn't be this dizzy," Vash replied. "Meryl!" Her eyes opened again. "Focus on me."  
"I...I can't..." Meryl closed her eyes again. "It's all blurry..."  
"Meryl- does it hurt anywhere?"  
"No... just a sinking feeling here..." She touched her chest. "And so dizzy...." Vash put his forehead against hers.  
"You're warm... a fever. But why?" He looked at Millie. "Get me some cool cloths." She handed him one a minute later and he put it against Meryl's forehead. She began to shiver.  
"Mr. Vash? Should I get a doctor?"  
"Yes." Millie vanished down the stairs as Vash tucked Meryl into bed.  
  
"This is really odd." Wolfwood leaned over the other side, exchanging the cloth on Meryl's forehead for a cooler one.  
"It's Knives." Vash replied. "He's done something to her." He didn't hear Wolfwood's reply. He thought hard for a moment. Knives had been having a hard time controlling that body. What if it had been the original owner that had knocked Meryl out- not Knives? But then why just leave her there? Unless he had done something else to her... something that would kill her slowly... He let himself relax, using his other senses to examine Meryl. And he found it in the palm of her left hand. Knives had put a drain on Meryl's life. The drain was pulling her life out of her, like a plant used a drain to feed it's energy into the processors. The drain had started off small- taking only a little bit at a time, but it was growing even as Vash watched...  
"Vash!" Wolfwood touched his shoulder. "Aren't you listening to me?"  
"He's killing her." Vash looked up at Wolfwood, pain in his eyes.  
"Vash, it's okay." Meryl spoke softly, her violet eyes dark and shadowed. "I want to do this- for you. Please?" Her hand tightened on his, her life leaking through his fingers.  
"NO!" Vash shouted at her. "How can you even ask...?" He choked suddenly as Meryl's eyes closed and he felt her life ebb faster.  
"Mr. Wolfwood..." Meryl whispered, "pray for me...." Her other hand reached out to Wolfwood. He took it gently, his voice already beginning a prayer...  
"Ave Maria, gratia plena, Dominus tecum..."  
"Hail Mary, full of grace..." Meryl's voice echoed weakly. Her life was slipping through his fingers. She was going to leave him...Vash choked, grief tearing at him.  
"Ora pro nobis peccatoribus, nunc, et in hora mortis nostræ..."  
"Pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death...." Death. She was dying... Like Rem...  
"I won't lose another one to Knives. I WON'T!!" His eyes glowed blue and his hand tightened on hers. He began to glow, radiating like a plant. Wolfwood stumbled away from the bed, a hand up over his eyes. Vash's glow spread down to Meryl, making her cry out.  
  
Wolfwood took his hand away from his eyes and blinked, trying to get the spots to go away. Vash was lying next to Meryl, both of them pale and waxy looking. He started to go to the bed and was shoved to the side by Millie and the doctor.  
  
"Well, they both seem okay to me. This young lady's fever is gone, and the young man just seems exhausted. Let them rest and if they don't wake up by tomorrow morning, come get me."  
Vash opened his eyes and sat up. "I'm okay doc. Just fainted."  
"Just fainted?" Wolfwood repeated incredulously.  
"Yep." Vash smiled. "Is there any dinner left, Millie? I'm starved!"  
"It's on the table." Millie thanked the doctor and showed him out. "Mr. Vash, is Meryl...?"  
"She'll be okay." Vash had already sat down at the table. "Don't worry. She'll wake up in a bit."  
As he ate, Vash insisted that Wolfwood and Millie get some sleep. He was perfectly able to watch Meryl. After assuring Millie that he would call her if he needed her, they left. Vash took off his vest and boots but left the rest of his clothes on. He put his pistol under the pillow and laid down next to Meryl, cradling her carefully against him. He could feel the drain, when he thought about it, slowly dripping like a leaky faucet, tugging on his life. This is what getting older must feel like, he thought sleepily. Your life disappearing slowly, a little bit at a time.... 


	8. Waking up

Disclaimer: Trigun is not mine. I'm sorry this chapter is so short. I hit a bit of writer's block on this one. I am working on the next part. You can go and look at my 'Revelations' fic, if you are craving more sap stuff. (Yes, I know- what a shameless plug, right?)  
  
"All right, Nicholas, what happened?" Millie asked him the minute he closed the door behind him. She was looking at him as if he had just taken her last cup of pudding.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Nicholas? I'm waiting..." Millie stepped closer to him. She was a big girl, he reminded himself as she looked him in the eye.  
  
"Well, after you left for the doctor, Vash told me Knives was killing Meryl."  
  
"Was he?"  
  
"I don't know. Meryl told Vash that she knew it and asked him to let her do this for him. She asked me to pray for her, so I started..."  
  
"Oh..."  
  
"And then- Vash went ballistic. He screamed at her that he wasn't going to let Knives get another one. Then he started to glow. Remember March city?"  
  
"Of course," Millie had turned white. She sat down on the bed.  
  
"Then, next thing I know they're both unconscious on the bed and you came in with the doctor." Wolfwood sat down next to her. "That's it. That's all I know. Somehow he saved Meryl."  
  
"This time," Millie looked at Wolfwood. "We're only a day away from LR town. What if..."  
  
"I've already thought about it. I don't know what to tell you honey, except that you should keep a close eye on Meryl and I'll keep one on Vash."  
  
"Okay, but my other eye is going to be on you." Millie leaned closer and put her arms around his waist. "You can't leave me again." He knew it was foolish to promise her anything, knew Knives would be after him as well. But he couldn't not reassure her.  
  
"I won't, honey. I won't."   
  
Meryl opened her eyes. Sunlight was streaming through the window and she could hear birdsong. A lovely morning, she thought. She was feeling so comfortable in bed... she looked down. Arms were wrapped around her and she could hear soft breathing in her ear. Her head was pillowed on his shoulder. She was happy... Wait a minute...she had been dying. She remembered- Wolfwood had been praying with her- Vash had been holding her hand. Then this light had appeared- the light everyone always talked about. So, how was she still here? And why did she feel so different?  
  
The morning was so beautiful: the smell of the sheets, the birdsong, everything seemed clearer, sharper... Without turning she knew that he had opened his eyes.  
  
"Vash."  
  
"I'm sorry Meryl, but I had to...uh... how do I explain this?" She turned and looked into his big blue eyes. She could feel his apprehension and fear, behind that however was hope and...  
  
"How do I know what you're feeling?" Surprise followed by a sudden joy. "Vash?"  
  
"I had to- Knives had put a drain on your chi. I managed to slow it down, but not stop it. So I tied your chi to mine." Her confusion rippled through him and he smiled.  
  
"Vash, explain it so I can understand it."  
  
"Sorry- chi is your life energy- what keeps you alive. Knives was draining yours so I closed down the drain as much as I could and then created a channel between you and me. You're sharing my life energy. That's why you can feel what I feel- you're a part of me now- in a way."  
  
"So, the drain is pulling my chi out of my body and you're replacing it with yours?"  
  
"Kind of. Your body is trying to replenish itself and it will to a certain extent, but yes, that is kind of what's happening."  
  
"No! You can't..." Vash put his fingers to her lips.  
  
"I did already. Don't worry- we'll live at least the 50 years that Knives promised. Won't that be enough?"  
  
"It's more than enough for me," Meryl began. "But..."  
  
"Meryl, you were willing to give your life up for me. Why won't you accept that I am willing to do the same?" He touched her cheek gently. Meryl caught her breath, feeling what he felt. Love.  
  
"But before- you said- you were different- that we couldn't..." He felt her fear that he would back away again and leave her alone.  
  
"I'm afraid I've made you different too by tying you to me like this. I just couldn't lose you..." He smiled faintly. "So now you're kind of stuck with me." His mouth brushed over hers gently, and he smiled as her love and relief washed over him.  
  
"It's not over Vash," she said softly after a moment. "We still have to face Knives."  
  
"I know." Vash's eyes grew cold. 


	9. Is this the end?

Disclaimer: Trigun is not mine. I'm not totally happy with this chapter, but I felt guilty leaving you hang for so long. Warnings: none! Well, except the usual sap ones.  
  
There was a knocking on the door a few minutes later. Vash went to answer it after making sure Meryl was securely wrapped up in the blankets.  
  
Millie bustled in, a tray in her hands. "Good morning, Vash! Good morning Meryl!" She put the tray down next to the bed and turned to look at her friend. "You're looking much better today," Millie told her friend with a cheerful smile. "You really had us worried..."  
  
"I know Millie." Meryl reached out a hand to her and tugged Millie down to sit next to her on the bed. Vash went about his morning routine, giving the girls a semblance of privacy. "I'm sorry." She had seen the shine of unshed tears in Millie's eyes and was trying to soothe her friend. "Did you and Mr. Wolfwood have breakfast this morning?"  
  
"Oh yes," Millie's fingers squeezed hers. "He's still downstairs, talking to some men. I guess there's news from LR."  
  
The room went dead quiet. Millie looked over at Vash to see that he had stopped mid-motion, not even breathing. Meryl's body had stiffened.  
  
"What news?" Vash asked.  
  
"Well, I guess one of the plants has- stopped working. They don't know if it's broken or what, but they are trying to hire a plant engineer to come and fix it."  
  
Millie was surprised to see Meryl reach out her free hand to Vash.  
  
"Stop it," she said softly to him. "You can't do anything about it from here." Vash finally moved, turning towards the bed and taking Meryl's hand in his own.  
  
"Don't suppose you'd wait here for me?"  
  
"No way in hell," she replied. He bent down and kissed her palm and Millie's eyes widened a bit. Well, now this was a surprising- though not upsetting- turn of events.  
  
"Then I should go get Nicholas and get ready to leave." She said quietly. "Right Mr. Vash?"  
  
"Thanks Millie," Vash answered her after a moment. He looked back at Meryl. "You're sure you feel up to it?"  
  
"Of course," Meryl smiled tenderly at him and Millie got swiftly to her feet. Now was a good time to leave them alone and find Nicholas.  
  
He was sitting by himself on the front porch of the inn, a cigarette dangling from his lips. He showed no sign of surprise that they were leaving soon.  
  
"Already packed up big girl. Do you need a hand?" He winked at her, trying to lighten her mood.  
  
"If you can get the car ready that'd be super," Millie smiled back at him.  
  
"You know where we're going don't you?" Wolfwood asked her as she turned.  
  
"To confront Knives," Millie answered him steadily. She turned her head and met his gaze squarely. "I am going with you. You need me to watch your back."  
  
"I wasn't going to try and persuade you otherwise," he smiled for her. "I just want you to be ready."  
  
"I will be." Millie's stern expression vanished and she gave him one of her sunny smiles. "I'll be right back!"  
  
In a short span of time they were back in the car and headed to LR. Vash was driving, tense and angry, his glasses hid his eyes. Meryl was next to him, just as quiet, as close as she could manage to be.  
  
Wolfwood and Millie were in the back. Millie rested her head against Wolfwood's shoulder as his fingers played with the ends of her hair. At least they weren't far from LR, Millie thought, relieved and tense at the same time. It was only a few more hours now. Only a few more hours.  
  
Vash hadn't known what to expect when they pulled into LR. A city decimated by sandworms, a city emptied of its people, a city of Knives-led zombies were a few of the possibilities he entertained.  
  
But it seemed normal. People were on the streets, walking, talking, shopping... just a normal city. Vash cast an eye towards the plants and opened his mind cautiously. Two were busily humming away, happy with their duties. The third- Knives- seemed dark with exhaustion.  
  
Ah. It had cost Knives to send out that assassin. Vash finally realized what he could do. He stopped the car in front of a restaurant.  
  
"Go eat," he said to the others. "I'll be back soon."  
  
"Vash-" Wolfwood started.  
  
"It's safe. He can't do anything right now. I swear it." Vash replied. "I'll be back soon."  
  
"Are you sure?" Meryl asked him, her anxiety clear to him.  
  
He leaned over and kissed her gently. "I'm sure." Then he got out of the car and headed towards the plants.  
  
Vash stood before the sphere that housed his brother. It began to glow with a pale light, growing stronger as the plant within spoke: Nice of you to visit, his brother projected his thoughts into Vash's mind. Miss me? Not as much as that little insurance girl of yours, I'm sure.   
  
She's not dead, Vash replied the same way.  
  
What? Knives flashed angrily. Vash felt Knives scan him. What have you done Vash? His brother's mind voice turned panicked. You'll die. You're going to die!   
  
I expect so. Vash answered amused. Everyone does.   
  
No! You can't! How could you do such a thing?   
  
You're the one who put the drain on her life. What else did you expect me to do? Vash's fingers touched the control panels. You have too much free time, Knives. We'll have to keep you busier than this.   
  
You were supposed to let her die!   
  
I love her. I couldn't let her die. Not when I could save her.   
  
Even though it means your death?   
  
Even so. Just as I would've given my life to save Rem all those years ago.Vash shrugged. I'm sorry I'll be leaving you alone Knives.   
  
No! You can't! You can't leave me alone! You're my brother!   
  
I am. But I can't let you go on hurting people Knives.   
  
But, Vash- brother... I tried to protect you. I tried to show you the way... They aren't like us! They use us! They hurt us!   
  
Can you tell me that you never hurt or used them? How are you any different? He adjusted the power outputs. You've done enough damage to this world, Knives; it's your job now to help fix it. To help bring Eden.   
  
Vash, his brother's mind voice grew fainter. Please, please let me out. I don't want to be eaten. That's what it feels like. Please...please....   
  
I'm sorry Knives. Once you're in a sphere like this you can't get out again. Your body has changed too much.   
  
We could try... together maybe we could...  
  
We both know that we can't. You'd never survive. Vash looked up at the sphere. I am sorry Knives, but this is my way of saving you.   
  
The final data streams were complete; more energy was being pulled out of Knives's sphere. His brother's voice was a whisper now.  
  
Then... you do still love me, Vash?   
  
You are my brother. I'll always love you.Knives's sphere glowed brighter for a second. Knives...?  
  
No answer. Vash tried again, but all he got was the same impression of distance that he got from most busy plants. He sighed and slipped quietly out of the building. Meryl was waiting for him around the corner. She reached out and slid her arms around him comfortingly.  
  
"I'm sorry Vash."  
  
"It had to be done, Meryl." Vash looked back at the sphere. "He won't have the energy to do anything else. He's taken care of- just like Rem asked." Meryl's arms tightened.  
  
"And how about you?"  
  
"Me?" Vash smiled down at her. "I'm going to settle down someplace with my wife. How does that sound?" She tilted her head up and kissed him softly.  
  
"As long as you mean me, broomhead, it sounds fine." He laughed out loud.  
  
"C'mon, love, let's go get the others and head out to Wolfwood's orphanage. I'll bet that two ex-gunslingers and two ex-insurance agents can settle down in there without too much trouble."  
  
They headed over towards the car where Wolfwood and Millie waited, with relieved looks on their faces.  
  
"Hey Millie!" Meryl called. "How do you feel about retiring?"  
  
"Sounds good to me!" Millie called back. "I was getting tired of the insurance business anyway. Too boring." The girls burst into laughter as the men looked at each other commiseratingly.  
  
"So, we hanging up our guns, Tongari?"  
  
"Yeah. Thought we'd come help you out at that orphanage for awhile."  
"Yeah. A peaceful existence has definite appeal," Wolfwood looked at Millie, still laughing with Meryl. He raised his eyebrow at Vash and held out his hand. "For love?" He started.  
  
Vash took it. "And peace," he agreed. 


End file.
